A blind date can quickly turn into a bad date. You need to learn when to cut your losses. Anything can go wrong -even from the very beginning. You could be stood up. If that is the case, have a glass of wine and go home and watch a movie, maybe even the movie “Blind Date”. There will be other dates, don’t waste your time wondering about that loser.

Sometimes you know at the get-go that he isn’t the man for you. Perhaps, like Pat Lunsford’s date, he’s taken you to MacDonalds. Not that there is anything wrong with fast food, but it isn’t ‘first date dining’.  Don’t be rude, or say you are going to the washroom and never come back. That’s just mean. You can let him know that you don’t feel that the two of you are a match, in a gentle manner. Maybe he is a wonderful guy, but doesn’t have money for a date, don’t rule him out. He might be a struggling artist or writer who is going to make it big one day.

On the other hand, if he wants to get food at the drive-thru and park somewhere, tell him where to go with his supersized drink and hamburger. If he is downright nasty, you have the right to leave, but tell him why, you’ll be doing him and future dates a favour, and you’ll get it off your chest.

Blind dates are usually arranged by well-meaning friends or family and more often than not, they turn out to be virtual nightmares. Ar first you begin to wonder if maybe it was a practical joke, until you realize, it’s no joke. Your friends either pawned the person off on you, or they honestly believed you would make a good couple.

I learned a lot about him on the way to the restaurant because he never once asked anything about me and told me his whole life story. He lived with his parents who were still supporting him until he invented something that would make him rich. And when we got to the restaurant, he opened my door and said that his mother had given him the money for the date. As we approached the restaurant, he told me that he was going to order the quarter-pounder meal and that I could order anything I wanted, and even super-size it. He then suggested a Big-Mac. It wasn’t exactly the kind of restaurant I had in mind, but I ordered a fish fillet and tea.
He carried our tray to one of the tables in the dinning room and asked me if I would get the drinks while he went to the bathroom to, as he put it, “make room for his dinner.” I had a pretty good idea what he meant, but certainly wasn’t going to ask him to verify it. And when I asked him what he wanted to drink, he asked for a suicide. When I hesitated, he said it was a mixture of all the available drinks.

The only way to end a bad blind date is with the truth, otherwise, it will come back to haunt you. Situations like that are highly possible when you accept a blind date. Therefore, if you are not prepared to gracefully back out of a bad blind date, you really shouldn’t accept it in the first place.

Click here to read the entire article by Pat Lunsford

We would love to hear how you handled a bad blind date.

What are your expectations of a blind date? Most of us go into these situations with trepidation. We almost curse the date by expecting the worst. Think positive! What’s the worst that can happen? Even if the date is a disaster, you may come out of it with a fun story to share with your friends. Sarah Summer makes some good points in her article on how to have a happy blind date. It helps to go into the date wishing for the best and preparing for the worst. You aren’t the only one on the date, if he senses that you aren’t giving him a chance, he won’t open up to you.

If you were set up on a date by a friend, you already have a recommendation. A man you have met online may be everything he says, or you may not recognize this person that you have been corresponding with. As Sarah points out, even if it isn’t a love connection, a blind date can lead to friendship. Or, he could be everything you were looking for in a man. Think how romantic your story will be if he is the one.

Imagine walking up to someone you’ve never met in your life and having to force a smile and share a happy conversation with them.

So if you want to ensure that you have a great time on your blind date, remember this basic etiquette tip. Learn to be genuinely warm the very second you meet your date for the first time.

When you warm up to your date, your date will feel more comfortable around you. And that would leave both of you feeling relaxed and happy to be with each other within a few seconds of meeting each other.

Be flexible in your expectations. Now I can’t tell you not to have any expectations at all, but instead, all I can suggest is to avoid having very high or low expectations from the date. Head to the date with an open mind, and try to think of it as if you were going to meet a friend.

If the chemistry clicks and both of you get smitten by each other, that’s good for you. Even otherwise, you won’t feel disappointed walking away from the date after meeting a potential friend.

Read the entire article by Sarah Summer

We would love to hear your blind date experiences

It used to be that a blind date was where a friend or relative set you up. These days, many of our dates start out “blind”. When you meet someone on a dating site, or social media, you are still going in blind, even if you’ve seen their photograph.

Don’t go into any date “blind”. Be prepared. Think about how you will react if the man sitting in front of you doesn’t meet your expectations. Plan an exit strategy, but remember to give him a chance, he might be nervous about meeting you, too!

Shallon Lester has some great tips for surviving a blind date and making it fun.

Throw out any and all expectations. The fastest way to kill a blind date is to walk in expecting Bradley Cooper and then feel nothing but disappointment when it’s someone other than Bradley Cooper (and I guarantee it will be). Even if you had an amazing, two-hour phone conversation and his online profile was custom written for you, do not expect Mr. Perfect. No one can live up to that. To make sure you don’t build up the date in your mind too much, stay busy beforehand. Also, I don’t mean you should have low expectations (“He’s going to suck”)-just have no expectations. Quick! Think about something else.

Watch the alcohol. The Millionaire Matchmaker’s Patti Stanger says not to drink more than two cocktails because you need clarity. I agree about the clarity; you don’t want to sober up after a month and realize you’re not attracted to the guy. However, two drinks isn’t much, especially if it’s a long date. Depending on your tolerance, who’s driving, and whether or not you eat, I think it’s okay to have three or four.

Leave your insecurities at home. If I sense a guy is not interested in me, I don’t focus on that fact (it won’t help anybody). Just try to find out what does make him smile (Your jokes? Talking baseball?). (P.S. Why worry he’ll be too good-looking and won’t think you’re cute? Super hot people never go on blind dates.)

Click here to read the entire article by  Shallon Lester

Share your blind dates stories with us in the comment box below.

You can probably hear your mother in your head every time you sit down to a meal… especially if there’s a date sitting across the table from you. But did you know that there are many other mannerisms on display that can reveal clues about your personality (and your date’s) that go far beyond basic table manners? It’s true! While bad table manners are typically a top dating turn-off, if your date passes the basics of decent behavior (i.e., not speaking with a full mouth or tucking a napkin into a shirt), go ahead and start gleaning even more about this person by minding your date’s manners in dealing with these silverware-based situations.

How did your last dinner date go?

Dining can be a romantic occasion. It is also a great way to get to know someone. If you can’t agree on a restaurant or the type of food, you already have a problem. Maybe he wants a big juicy steak and you’re a vegetarian. The way a man eats his food can be a turn-off.

As Kimberly Dawn Neumann points out, dining out gives you the opportunity to observe your date on so many levels.  If your date can’t put his smartphone away during dinner, or treats the wait staff with disrespect, you know right away that he isn’t the best choice for a second date.

Does he tip well? More importantly, did he listen to what you were saying, or were his eyes on the cute waitress serving you dinner?  A good dinner date can turn into a second date and soon you’ll be inviting him to dine at your place.

Click here to read the full article by Kimberly Dawn Neumann

Share your stories with us in the comment box below.

Sometimes the man of your dreams is right in front of your eyes: that best friend who is always there for you. The man you run to when someone you are dating breaks your heart. The guy who accepts you for who you are. He says you look great even when you aren’t wearing makeup.

You know the debate – can men and women truly be platonic friends? Yes, but sometimes your male friend is the perfect mate, and you haven’t noticed. There is a reason that you get along so well.

Dating a friend can be awkward at first. You are changing the status of your relationship, and if it doesn’t work out, it may ruin your friendship. Denise Ngo provides some insight into evolving your friendship into a dating relationship:

There’s nothing quite like feeling a spark of attraction between you and someone you just met. Lately though, we’ve been wondering whether it’s better to date a friend, or at least somebody we’ve known longer than just a couple of weeks, and who knows more about us than just our name and phone number.

Let’s face it, during the first few months of dating someone new, it’s easy to hold yourself together and pretend like you don’t have a dark side (everybody has one). You downplay your insecurities in hopes that he won’t see you as clingy, and you suppress the fact that you occasionally get moody, jealous, or pointlessly angry. With a friend-to-boyfriend, he’s not only aware of your personal weaknesses, but he knows how to respond to them in a way that is constructive to the relationship and to your desire to improve yourself.

On that same note, you’re already aware of his bad fashion sense, his corny jokes, and his strange fondness for period pieces. Heck, you realize you like him all the more for the quirks you might find annoying in someone else.

Click here to read the full article by Denise Ngo

Have you ever dated a friend? Share your stories with us.

Have you ever been attracted to someone you had absolutely nothing in common with? Sometimes it can be exciting to spar over a glass of wine on politics, religion, music or art.

Dating your opposite can be a challenge. If he likes country music and you like rock, attending a concert together may be out of the picture. On the other hand, you may learn to like something that you never thought would interest you. It can be boring to be with someone who agrees with everything you say. Look at the American political commentator James Carville. James is a true Democrat but he is married to Republican consultant Mary Matalin. They often appear together on CNN voicing their dissenting opinions, yet they have been married for nearly 20 years.

(There is a video of the two of them talking about their relationship here:

“If the qualities that attract you to someone are different from your own, be cautious, “ says clinical psychologist and author of How to Know If Someone is Worth Pursuing in Two Dates or Less, Dr. Neil Clark Warren. He points out that while opposites often attract, they also usually drive each other crazy over the long haul. Dr. Warren’s three decades of counseling married couples has led him to make “finding someone similar to you” one of the pillars of his relationship advice. “I don’t discount how hard it is to find someone who is a lot like you. It has always been difficult, and it’s become even more so, as diversity increases. But when two people come from similar backgrounds, they operate from a position of strength. Their relationship is made significantly easier by all the customs and practices they have in common.”

You CAN make a spicy relationship work! eHarmony points out the areas that cause the most contention, but if you are serious about this relationship, you can deal with these issues together.

What sort of differences cause the most trouble? When considering whether a particular person is a good relationship candidate for you look to four specific areas.
Energy Level – If she likes to go dancing three times a week and he loves to relax on the couch most nights…look out.
Personal Habits – This includes punctuality, cleanliness, weight management, and smoking.
Use of Money – When one person wants to save for the future and the other is eager to spend and enjoy life now; the conflict can be deadly to a relationship.
Verbal Skills and Interests – If one person is dying for more conversation and the other wants more peace and quiet, there is a lot of stress.

Click here to read the full article by eHarmony staff

Are you attracted to your opposite, or do you play it safe? Share your dating stories with us.

Why are some women attracted to the bad boy? Smart women know that the excitement of dating a rogue doesn’t last. The bad boy can turn out to be a dangerous or abusive man.

Women want men to look beneath the surface, but we should be willing to do the same. Nice guys finish last; at least that is what the good guys are always complaining about. Just because a man says the right things, doesn’t mean he is going to do the right things. Don’t allow the con artist to sweet talk his way into your heart. You deserve better. Take your time and get to know a man before you get in too deep. Watch out for the red flags!

Angela Kennedy explores the reasons we are attracted to men who aren’t good for us:

But what makes the leather-clad, motorcycle-riding bad boy so appealing? What does she see in the commitment-phobic, party animal man-child? What’s so attractive about the older, mysterious (read: oftentimes married) man?
…
“Women should look for courtship. It’s an old-fashioned word, but the principle of it still holds true. He must be willing to pursue you. Today, women don’t even know how to be courted — they don’t have any expectation of it,” [Nina] Atwood says. “But as a woman, one of the most important decisions you will ever make in your life is your choice of a life partner. Make a poor one, and the consequences could be devastating for years. Make a good one, and you have the foundation for a lifetime of happiness.”

Click here to read the full article in Counselling Today by Angela Kennedy:

Have you turned down Mr. Right for Mr. Wrong? Share your experiences with us in the comment box below.

Learning how to read body language is an important facet of dating. A man’s body language can let you know what he is really feeling, even if he is giving you a line. Do his eyebrows go up slightly when he meets you? Does he lean in towards you while talking?

Body language expert Tonya Reiman provides tips on how to read a man’s body language. Tonya’s dos and don’ts on using your body to send the right signals are worth  memorizing! Much of what we say to each other isn’t verbalized. Learning how to read people is a skill, but it is one that you can master and gain the advantage in the dating world.

He is interested if …

• He looks at you and his eyebrows go up – this indicates interest

• His pupils dilate (recognize lighting).

• His lips part slightly.

• He looks you up and down slowly.

• You are his sole focus of attention (you are the only one in the room, metaphorically).

• He touches himself, anywhere, while looking at you (runs his hands through his hair, fixes his socks, brushes his suit jacket, etc.).

• A shoulder flash (which is a speedy lifting of the shoulders) conveys interest by demonstrating harmlessness.

• Posturing — erect stance, chest out, shoulders back, stomach in.

• Leans his upper body toward you.

Read the full article here at ABC News

Tell us what you think. Leave your comments in the box below.

If you are afraid to enter the dating world because you have children, don’t be!
There are plenty of single parents who are finding romance with partners who understand that your children come first. Be upfront with your date and tell him about your child, or children. If he runs in the other direction, you don’t really want him in your life anyway. As a parent, you are ultimately looking for a partner who has the capacity to love you and your children. Or maybe you just want to get away from the kids for a few hours and have some adult conversation.There are plenty of men who will understand your priorities, and respect your time constraints. But where do can you meet these men?  Christine Coppa enlists the help of relationship expert Amy Spencer:

When Do I Introduce the Kids?
Problem: I’ve been dating a nice man consistently for seven weeks and I’m wondering if it’s time to introduce my 10-year-old son to him. Is there ever a right time? –Diane, 40, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Solution: Just like you don’t tell your kid everything, you don’t have to introduce them to everyone. “It is important to not introduce your kids to every person you go on two or three dates with. Many kids form attachments very easily. When kids are introduced to someone ‘special,’ they assume it actually means something and then if the person disappears, this shifts their whole belief system,” says Ledley.
This doesn’t mean you can’t ever introduce your child to Mr. Right or that you have to sneak around like a high schooler.
“Just wait until it really seems as if the relationship is serious and stable. Then, it can be nice to introduce your child to a new person in their own environment. Have the new boyfriend/girlfriend over for a casual pizza party. The kids will feel more comfortable in their own home and might enjoy bonding by showing the new person their stuff, like a favorite toy or backyard space,” advises Ledley.

How Do I Make, uh, Sex Actually Happen?
Problem: Face it, even though I’m 29, I have a curfew — as in I have to get home to relieve the babysitter. I’ve been seeing someone for two months now and I want to…you know. How do I have my adult fun when the date is on a time schedule? –Shannon, 29, Avon, Ohio

Click here to read the full article by Christine Coppa.

Are you ready to make some “me” time and enjoy a play date that doesn’t involve your children?

Many of us are lonely and some of us are even uncomfortable in our own skin. That doesn’t make for good relationship material! It sounds trite, and you’ve probably heard it over and over…. you need to learn to love yourself first.

Life Coach Kelly Rudolph points out – you need to learn to be ‘single and happy’ before you can be happy as part of a couple. She says that there is a much greater chance you’ll meet the wrong man if you don’t work on your own happiness first. Because two sad and lonely people don’t add up to a fun couple.

If you’re thinking to yourself that relationships mean having someone to help you get through life, you may need to take a better look at life. Life isn’t something to be gotten through. Life is to be lived, loved, laughed, danced and celebrated! This can only truly happen with two people who recognize they are complete even if they are not part of a couple at any given time. Two people who want to be together and aren’t simply together because no one else was available at the time!

When we know how to be happy single and enjoy time with friends and alone time without the need for a relationship to validate our existence then we have a lot more fun when we are in a relationship. And we are more likely to attract a man who knows how to be happy single as well. This means the relationship will be created from two mentally and emotionally healthy people instead of two needy people.
Click here to read the full article by Kelly Rudolph.

Get the most out of life now!
Don’t wait for a man to bring you fulfillment, find it on your own, and soon you’ll find someone to share it with.

Write us and let us know how you found happiness as a single woman.